Pregnancy and Postpartum Q +A

Pregnancy and Postpartum Q +A

Figuring out what to do when it comes to important decisions like your birth, postpartum and baby can be overwhelming. The best resource for me in addition to some of my own basic research, was hearing what worked for other moms. My goal of this post is to organize my responses to the questions I have gotten through DM so that I can easily provide links and information to those who are interested in what has worked for our family. Ultimately, it comes down to what is best for you, your budget, unique situation and needs. Information overload is REAL especially when your feeling all hormonal and vulnerable, so please remember that as long as you are loving on your sweet baby, you really can’t go wrong!

What ____ do you have?

Before I dive into the rest of the Q + A… here are the items I am most frequently asked about and links. They also happen to be the items I use the most! Again, every family has unique needs and different budgets, but these are what have worked for us. Use the arrow to scroll for more.

What did you do during pregnancy to promote a healthy pregnancy and birth?

Find details on a lot of what I did in this blog post. Most of the things that I describe doing to flip our breech baby were things that I did anyways to prepare for birth- just ramped them up during that time! Maya abdominal massage, chiropractic care, holistic pelvic care and prenatal yoga to prepare physically. This isn’t just about being strong and prepared for labor, but also helps get the uterus into optimal positioning. Hypnobirthing course/meditations, acupuncture, reading and listening to natural birth stories, making a birth plan and having a doula also helped tremendously!

What tips do you have for staying comfortable in the third trimester?

Get a body pillow- I liked using a U-shaped one! Also, get a yoga ball! I sat on it all the time while pregnant used one during birth and still use it to calm Harper and bounce him to sleep. I also did hypnobirthing meditation daily, prenatal yoga, went on walks and did the miles circuit towards the end.

Do you have your birth story on your blog?

Yes! You can read about How Our Breech Baby Flipped at 37 Weeks and our Unmedicated Natural Hospital Birth in these blog posts.

What are your postpartum recovery must haves?

I am SO glad that I had some mamas give me these items because I would have had no idea what I needed! A perineal washer for keeping clean, perineal spray for pain relief, belly wrap for core/back support, herbs and epsom salt for sitz baths, body oil for dry skin and self-care massage, nipple cream for painful breastfeeding/pumping (if you need this there may be an issue please consult an IBCLC). My biggest “must-have” is being prepared mentally as much as possible… read my 8 Mistakes to Avoid During Postpartum here.

What are some ideas for postpartum easy meals?

The easiest meals during postpartum were the ones that I prepped in advance, froze and could reheat. These got eaten up so much quicker than I anticipated and wish I had made even more! You can find the ways I stocked my freezer in this blog post. My other go-tos have been rice bowls or toasts with the goal of packing as much calories and nutrition into one meal as possible! It was key during both pregnancy and postpartum to keep my fridge stocked with the essentials for quick snacks and meals. There is nothing worse than opening an empty fridge when you are 9 months pregnant or a few days postpartum, tired and hangry! Find all my essentials for stocking the fridge in my Pregnancy + Postpartum Nutrition Plan.

What were you told about working out postpartum?

I was cleared to work out by my regular OB at my 6 week check up. However, I knew from my doulas and other mamas that I needed to be careful with this. My holistic OB cleared me for gentle yoga/walking at 6 weeks, low impact cardio at 2 months and high impact workouts at 6 months. I also did physical therapy with a practice that specializes in postpartum care (was covered by insurance) to heal my diastatis recti and strengthen my pelvic floor.

Do you have a sleep schedule? What do you do for sleep/naps?

We don’t have a schedule but we have routines. I like being flexible and try to offer naps and feedings on demand when he cues. We did the Taking Cara Babies newborn class and 4-5 month guide, and I have also used her blog posts to learn about infant sleep. I had no idea developmentally what amounts of sleep infants need or what to do to help him sleep. I hate hearing him cry and am not personally comfortable doing sleep training but also lack of sleep has really taken a toll on my mental and physical health. Her resources have helped me know about how many hours are developmentally appropriate to go between naps, how to look out for sleepy cues and things to do to help him fall asleep and learn to fall asleep. I don’t do all of the stuff she suggests but a lot of it really helped! Sleep is unpredictable like most things in baby world, so I try to let go of expectations and just do what works for us.

How did you discover your sons tongue tie? Did you get it fixed?

The pediatrician at the hospital told us his tongue was “tight”. I didn’t know what that meant and when I followed up with healthcare professionals we were seeing nobody seemed worried about it. Fast forward 3 months and he had fallen off the growth chart and was diagnosed failure to thrive. I brought it up again at that point to one of our healthcare professionals who finally thought it could be the issue. She referred us to a pediatric dentist who diagnosed and revised the ties (both lips and tongue) with a laser that same day. Without getting into two much detail, I highly recommend being evaluated by either a pediatric dentist or ENT as soon as you suspect an issue. Chiropractic care, physical therapy and craniosacral therapy were essential to our recovery process and something we were not referred to but needed to have been. This website helped me learn more about tongue and lip ties after we went through it, but I wish I would have found it sooner.

What did you do to increase your milk supply? Did you use supplements?

When I went from nursing a baby with a tongue and lip to to exclusively pumping, I noticed that I did not make as much milk as I thought I did and needed. I was able to quickly amp up my supply with these tips, but please understand that many women’s bodies are not physically able to create all of the milk their babies need. This is nothing to feel guilty or shameful about. It is more common than people think and if you have tried everything under the sun, please know that you are not alone or doing anything wrong.

I would strongly CAUTION against using herbs/supplements. They can sometimes have an adverse effect on both mom and baby. I increased supply mainly with demand. The more your breasts are stimulated either through nursing or pumping, the more demand you create. Nutrition and making sure I was both hydrated (lots of coconut water!) and eating enough nutrient dense foods and calories also helped.

Please also know that breastfeeding does not have to be all or nothing. I made myself crazy exclusively nursing a baby with a tongue and lip tie and then exclusively pumping and trying to latch him 8-12 times a day in addition to bottle feeding him while re-learning to suck. I don’t regret my journey, but now that I have introduced some formula I realize that formula can really help to extend breastfeeding if exclusively breastfeeding is physically or mentally causing distress. Both breast milk and/or formula have everything a baby needs to be healthy, happy and strong.

How do you wash your pump parts?

When I was pumping 8-12 times a day I did the “fridge hack”. This is when you put your parts in the fridge between sessions. I would only refrigerate once so I would use them for 2 sessions. Once I started spacing out my pumping more, I stopped doing the fridge hack. I also got scared when I found out that the CDC warns against it. Now I wash all parts between uses except for the back flow protectors which I wash once a day. During travel, I bring multiple sets in gallon ziplocks and only use them once, then put them in a dirty parts bag to wash at my destination. I bring these wipes in case of an emergency like I forget a part or have to pump at extra time.

How do you travel with breast milk?

I could not figure this out for the longest time and racked my brain for months before traveling! I am sooo happy with both the plans of what we did when traveling with and without Harper.

For traveling with him (this plan is based on exclusively pumping): we bring a days worth of frozen milk and several fresh bottles. I feed the fresh bottles while traveling then serve the frozen milk once it has thawed when we arrive. Why? I don’t want the pressure of pumping and serving immediately during travel thats too stressful so I save that milk and deal with it upon arrival. Since I brought a days worth of frozen milk, I freeze the extra fresh milk I pump on the trip when I get home, This also helps rotate my freezer stash to use up old milk and replace with new. If you do not have a freezer stash, I would bring enough fresh milk to last for the travels if you can and if you are a just-enougher, I would pump directly into the bottles your baby eats from using an adaptor if necessary! ** I haven’t traveled since starting to combo feed and introduce formula so don’t have any tips on that yet!

For traveling without him: I used Milk Stork and it was soooo worth it! I pumped on planes, cars, airports, etc. because I will not waste a drop I just can’t mentally handle that! If you are traveling for work, you can submit a request for your employer to pay for Milk Stork.

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8 Mistakes to Avoid During Postpartum Recovery

8 Mistakes to Avoid During Postpartum Recovery

I’ve learned a lot during these past 5 months. I could have read all the postpartum books in the world, but nothing could have prepared me for this experience. It’s hard to anticipate your needs after giving birth, but this list of what to avoid will help recovery be centered around what is most important… the needs of you and your new baby!

1. Measuring Against your Expectations

It is impossible not to have 1000 expectations and plans from the time you try to conceive. From when you want to get pregnant to what your birth will be like and how and what you plan to feed your baby- it’s hard not to fantasize about the perfect experience. While there is no harm in planing, it is important not to remain attached to these expectations, as more likely than not you will have to adapt. I was lucky that our unmedicated, natural birth became a reality, but our breastfeeding “plan” took an unexpected turn. Because I was so attached to planning on nursing for a year, I was unfairly hard on myself when things didn’t work out as expected. Adopting a flexible mindset to go along with expectations is absolutely key to physical and mental health and wellness during postpartum.

2. Comparing Your Experience to Others

The comparison game is always a tough one, especially during such an emotionally vulnerable period. In the time of social media, it is hard to see smiling new moms out with their happy baby in tow sipping on a margarita. Or a mama cooking a deliciously healthy homemade stir fry while bouncing baby on their hip. How about a 5 weeks postpartum mom hitting the gym flashing a shockingly flat tummy? Those are all things I saw on social media postpartum and couldn’t help comparing to the overwhelming day to day challenges I was facing. I did choose to go off of social media for the first couple weeks, but whether it’s digitally or in real life- there will always be other mamas to compare with and it’s about being at peace with where you are on your unique journey.

Don’t forget that an instagramworthy photo from a professional shoot is not always the full picture

3. Trying to Do it All

During pregnancy I assumed that my introverted self would want as few people around as possible. The prospect of family, friends and professional help in the house gave me anxiety. When we were generously gifted postpartum doula hours for the first few weeks, I reconsidered. I figured that we could test drive a few nights and see how we felt about having someone besides family around. Literally the day after our first night home from the hospital we called to add more hours. We also begged my mom to stay with us through the first two weeks! I never anticipated how overwhelming our challenging feeding/breastfeeding experience would be and navigating first time parenting. During pregnancy I assumed that having help around would mean not spending time with my baby. But instead, having support meant, extra hands to help with the thousands of other things that allowed me to spend even more quality time with baby and make sure to take care of myself.

4. Rushing to Get Moving

6 weeks and you’re cleared to whip yourself back into shape- right? Wrong. Most women are cleared to return to normal activity after 6 weeks despite their bodies being nowhere near what they used to be. A majority of pregnancy and births result in diastasis recti (separation of the abdominal muscles) and pelvic floor issues. These require careful training and can create lifelong problems if ignored. I was fortunate to have mamas warn me about their regrets of jumping back into running and high intensity workouts too soon, leading to long term issues with incontinence and core strength. I chose to hold off on almost all activity other than short walks until 6 weeks, at which point I began 6 weeks of pelvic floor physical therapy (covered by insurance!) and gentle yoga. At 2 months postpartum I added low impact cycling and barre class. I plan to slowly and carefully return to high impact/intensity workouts at 6 months postpartum, prioritizing optimal healing for long term physical health.

Take it slow! A walk outside is an amazing postpartum workout…. save the high intensity stuff for later

5. Saying Yes When You Mean No

This is a sacred time for you and your family. Do not feel pressured to allow others to make it about them. Figure out what you want and what you don’t want. This is different for everyone. For me, I did not want a meal train, which I know is a popular form of postpartum support these days. Instead, I froze my own food and knew that those I am closest with would offer to bring us food regardless. I did not want to “say yes” to people coming by at certain pre-arranged dates and times only to find it to be a stressful day when I wouldn’t want visitors and it was worth sacrificing the help with meals. I instead asked for favors like errands, grocery pick ups and laundry. I found that the people who truly want to help will be happy to do what YOU find most helpful.

6. Neglecting Your Needs

That first week I totally went against my own beliefs on self care and neglected my most basic needs. Although I had plenty of support around me, I chose not to prioritize making time to take care of my physical health. I make a point to say “I chose not to” because it doesn’t feel like a choice, but it is. Our primal instincts kick in to devote every second of energy to baby and feel guilty stepping away and letting others help. A week in I had a day where my mental and physical health came crashing down. I recognized the need to change how I was doing things and started taking sitz baths, made sure to eat more, and sleep through a feeding each night.

Those primal instincts kick in and all of a sudden we neglect our own most basic needs

7. Doubting Your Expertise

From the moment Harper was born, he had difficulty latching/eating. These struggles continued for 3 months until we hit rock bottom with a failure to thrive diagnosis. I knew something was wrong from the beginning and finally was ready to listen to MY intuition and figure out a solution. If I would have continued doubting my expertise, we may not have figured out he had a tongue and lip tie. Finally at 5 months, he is eating like a champ and we have found our new normal. I learned such an important lesson, as I felt strongly like something was wrong from the beginning but didn’t prioritize my own innate knowledge as a mom.

8. Focusing on Whats Next

It is so natural to long for things to get easier. I found myself thinking - I can’t wait for my stitches to heal and to feel better, for breastfeeding to feel easier, for him to gain weight, to sleep more… the list goes on. I had to constantly remind myself to stay present and enjoy these challenging, but precious moments because no matter how hard it felt- I would never get these days back. I realize that just like we did, many families face unique challenges and regardless, we have to find solace in those precious newborn moments to maintain our sanity and stay grounded.

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Harper's Birth Story: Our Unmedicated Natural Hospital Birth

He came just in time to be a Summer Solstice and Gemini baby

Our Unmedicated Natural Hospital Birth Story

All births are natural births. There is nothing more natural than a chid being brought into the world. It seems that is often lost by the label of “natural” commonly referring solely to unmedicated vaginal births, making many moms who are unable to have them disappointed to not have a “natural” experience. Before I dive into our unmedicated, natural birth- I want to share my experience with this leading up to the day Harper was born.

Our birth story started long before our trip to the hospital on the stormy evening of the Summer Solstice. It began when we discovered our baby was breeched at 37 weeks (read the full story here). This was the first junction when I realized our wish for an unmedicated birth may be out of our hands. It was difficult to wrap my head around an alternative birth plan, as baby was unlikely to flip at this point. After he shockingly flipped- against all odds, I again ran into a similar feeling when we went past our due date. My provider was pushing for a 41 week induction, which I knew would invite the cascade of interventions I was trying to avoid.

I realize that we were lucky to be able to arrive at a point where our birth plan could become a reality. I want to share my story to empower those who are curious if an unmedicated hospital birth is possible and what that looks like, as well as normalize sharing birth experiences! Yes, our birth was unmedicated, making it what is often referred to as “natural”, but I want to ac knowledge that all births are natural and beautiful, not just experiences like ours. Let’s all agree that a baby miraculously being born is the most natural thing in the world, regardless of the circumstances.

Our birth experience was everything I hoped for, yet nothing what I expected

The 7 Phases of My Unmedicated Natural Birth

Birth is a process and no two experiences are the same. I am going to walk you through the 7 phases of my experience: Prodromal Labor, Early Labor, Active Home Labor, Active Hospital Labor, Pushing, Birth and After Birth. I have decided to spill it all in an effort to avoid a birth story that glosses over the details and only shares the highlights. My goal is to normalize birth by discussing the more taboo parts that are often left out of the day to day conversation (yes, I talk about my tear, bleeding and first pee). Would love to hear any questions you have or your own birth experiences in the comments below!

40 weeks and 4 days- the morning of his birth! I was probably in labor and didn’t know it yet

Phase 1: Prodromal Labor

On Tuesday of the week Harper was born I went to acupuncture and asked for all the induction points. Now past his due date, I was anxious for anything that could help me avoid being medically induced. That night, I finally started to feel something! I had never felt any Braxton Hicks (practice contractions) during the pregnancy so I wasn’t sure if this was them or a sign of labor. Wednesday morning I still felt some crampiness and painless contractions. I went to my weekly scheduled doctor appointment and she told me it was probably prodromal labor, which was a good sign, but could come and go for an unpredictable length of time. Since I declined vaginal checks, I didn’t really have any other indications like dilation, etc.

When I realized I was in labor (look how low he is!), I took my last at home shower for a while and quickly devoured a bowl of granola

Phase 2: Early Labor

After having the prodromal labor end and feeing nothing all day Thursday and Friday morning, I was careful not to get my hopes up when things started back up Friday afternoon. My parents who had come into town for his due date, a friend and I were hanging out at my mother in law’s pool when the crampiness set back in. I was unable to sleep a wink the night before and the exhaustion and cramps had me ready to crawl into bed, so I asked my parents to drive me home. As soon as I walked in the house and tried to relax, I suspected that something real might be happening. I texted our doula who said I probably had a while to go based on what I described and how calm I was. She told me to do the miles circuit and try to get some rest. I took what would I figured would be my last at home shower for a while and ate a bowl of granola to try to keep my energy up. When I laid down to try do the miles circuit and listen to my hypnobirthng meditation things began to feel more intense, so I asked our doula to come over ASAP.

The beginning of my active labor at home- clearly before things got too intense…

Phase 3: Active Home Labor

By the time our doula came over, I was having to make a conscious effort to ride out and breathe through contractions. For the next couple of hours she led me in doing different positions for sets of contractions (i.e. 10 contractions in a wall sit). I had practiced holding similar positions in yoga while pregnant, which really helped. When each contraction intensified she would massage my lower back, distracting my body from the discomfort. I also held a lavender satchet during most of the labor and would inhale it during contractions, helping me relax. The setting couldn’t have been more peaceful, with me, Andrew, Logan (our dog) and our doula in our bedroom/bathroom with the sound of the most intense thunderstorm I’ve ever heard happening outside!

We knew it was time for the hospital when I began to be really get “in the zone” and couldn’t help but grunt and moan my way through the contractions. Our doula had always described that turning point, but I had thought that I wouldn’t be someone who was loud during labor… I was wrong! Everything about it felt out of body, primal and uncontrollable. Andrew called the doctors office to tell them we were on our way (something we wouldn’t have known to do without our doula!) and we grabbed all of our things.

Phase 4: Active Hospital Labor

I was scared to move from the comfort of our dark, peaceful bedroom to the car and hospital after hearing stories of labor being stalled and the body going into “fight or flight” under bright lights and stressful circumstances. Thankfully I didn’t experience any of that. It’s a weird feeling when you arrive at the hospital because your whole world is so intense and moving so fast, but everyone else is just chilling. People in the waiting room were staring at me as I could barely squeak out my social security number in between being doubled over through contractions.

Next thing I knew I was back in the hospital room. After quickly checking my vitals and monitoring baby, I was given a saline lock, then able to move freely without any further fetal monitoring or IVs, etc. since I wasn’t getting an epidural. The doctor let us know that I was 6 cm dilated and 90% effaced with my “water” (aka amniotic sac) still intact. My birth plan was to do things with the least amount of interventions possible, but I went in with an open mind ready to intuitively navigate the situation as it unfolded. I appreciated not being offered any sort of medication, as I requested, but was glad that our doctor did offer the intervention of breaking my water. After consulting with both her and our doula, I decided it was a go. Feeling exhausted already, I wanted anything that would help with the fastest possible, unmedicated birth. I couldn’t feel her break my water, just felt a warm liquid- really not bad at all. I remember looking at the clock around this time and seeing it was 9:30.

At that point the doctor and nurse left us alone to labor peacefully, so it was just Andrew, our doula and I in a dimly lit room with essential oils diffusing- definitely a relaxing hospital setting. As someone who is always cold, I have literally never been so hot! Andrew and our doula immediately began feeding me ice chips and putting a cold washcloth on my neck. The hospital active labor was a more intense version of what we were doing at home. Our doula helped me get through sets of contractions in various locations/positions. We moved from a birth ball to wall sits to squats in the shower, where I proceeded to go from hot to freezing cold! The best way I can describe my labor experience is a really intense workout class while being on insane drugs and turning into a wild animal! With each contraction I took long deep breaths in and heard myself letting out loud moans that felt really similar to the release of an “ohm” in yoga. Letting out energy through moans and even shrieks and screams really helped me deal with the intensity and discomfort.

Phase 5: Pushing

I could feel things growing much more intense and changing, so I requested to be checked again. I was surprised how uncomfortable being checked is and was glad I hadn’t done it during my pregnancy visits. Finally at 8 cm dilated, I was starting to feel really ready to get this done and meet our baby! I kept saying, “something is coming!” and “is the baby coming yet?!”. I felt a distinct change from just having contractions to actually feeling the baby coming down and ready to be pushed out of my body. I was disappointed that he wasn’t crowning yet despite how it felt, so I had to be patient and stay strong mentally and physically. I remember looking at the clock, seeing it was 11:15 and wondering if he’d be born before midnight.

At that point things start to get a little more blurry! I can’t remember how much time passed but know that eventually I was in bed. I was exhausted from the night before and really beginning to run low on energy. The doctor had discovered while checking me that I had a cervical lip (part of my cervix that was a little unevenly stuck). They brought me a peanut ball to put between my legs and lay in a fetal position. Laying there and being still had me more focused on the pain, but I breathed through it for a few more contractions knowing that getting baby in a better position would help in the long run.

Eventually they encouraged me to move to a squatting position (in bed) - think malasana squat with a bar to hang onto. With zero energy left, I tried to hang on and breathe through it as long as I could but eventually had to surrender to my body and let myself lay back and do what felt more comfortable.

The moment I’ll never forget- finally getting to meet our sweet baby!

Phase 6: Birth

I had planned on not pushing and wanted to wait for the fetal ejection reflex (when your body involuntarily pushes the baby out). When the time came, my brain and body seemed no longer connected and I was simply an observer as I felt myself pushing out the baby. It look about 4-5 pushes, with the most difficult being the second to last push. He was almost out and they told me I just needed a few good last pushes. As my body pushed, I let out the most blood curdling shriek as my pelvic floor muscles tore open to let baby out.

Thankfully the natural oxytocin kicked in and I was able to get through one final push that brought our beautiful Harper Benjamin Earthside at 11:54PM. I have never felt and can’t even describe the full body relief that comes with birthing a baby. All of the intense pressure that had been building for months, the physical, emotional and spiritual build up was instantaneously released.

Mama instincts immediately kicked in- warmed him up skin-to-skin when his body temp dropped

Phase 7: After Birth

The cord leading to him was literally glowing- I had never seen anything so cool. It was blue and shiny and looked like a Unicorn horn. I was in complete shock for a few minutes. There was a pause where I felt nothing and then everything was hazy and in slow motion. I don’t remember seeing him until he was on my chest and they announced, “it’s a boy!” (so glad we have a few video clips our doula took so I can remember this!).

They asked what his name was and though Harper Benjamin was the top of our list, we needed a few minutes to figure out if it felt right! Meanwhile, the post-baby process of birth began to unfold. Birth isn’t over after the baby comes out- the placenta still needs to be delivered. This came easily for me, which I know is not always the case. I don’t even remember noticing it happen. On the other hand, I clearly remember the doctor stitching up my second degree tear. Both the push that tore me and the stitching was by far the most uncomfortable part of the whole labor and birth- but nothing I couldn’t handle! I flinched and yelped as she realized that the local anesthetic she injected before stitching must not have taken care of the whole area- OUCH.

Though the birth was over, I had to stay in the labor and delivery room for 3 more hours because of some moderate bleeding. My labor and birth were unmedicated, however I gladly accepted a shot of pitocin to help stop the bleeding. I winced as the doctor and nurses pressed on my uterus to push out any clots. Fortunately, the nurse who came in next (coincidentally one of my amazing former students!) realized that if I probably had a full bladder, making it painful for them to push on my uterus. She was right (peeing wasn’t exactly on my mind during labor!) and took me to empty my bladder. Lets just say that acid + wounds + being completely unmedicated = not my favorite pee i’ve ever taken… but the uterus pressing became way more comfortable after.

Around this time, our doula helped me try to nurse Harper for the first time. This didn’t work out very well and I actually blacked it out- I only slightly recalled when she recently told me about this moment. She suggested I contact the lactation consultant I had met during pregnancy to have her come right away the next morning (another reason doulas are a must!). This experience and more on our breastfeeding challenges will be a future blog post!

Around 3 am, our nurse wheeled us to the recovery room where we quickly said hi to our parents who waited up to meet Harper. Next the nurses checked his vitals and discovered that his temperature had dropped. They wanted to put him under the heating lamps in the nursery, but I told them that I wanted to warm him via skin to skin. They advised that I try for a half hour, but if he wasn’t warm then he would need to go to the nursery (though they can’t actually say you “need” to do anything- it is always your choice!). Sure enough, he warmed right up on my chest, where he has basically been living for the past 8 weeks!

Our birth experience was everything I had hoped for, but nothing like I expected! I honestly wouldn’t change a thing and am grateful to feel that way. Have a question or want to share about your birth experience? Leave it in the comments below!

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4 Ways I'm Stocking my Freezer for Clean Eating

Clean eating is so much easier when you are prepared! Typically I try to keep my fridge, freezer and pantry stocked with healthy ingredients and make extra of whatever I am preparing for dinner to eat for subsequent meals. I know that my current habits will have to evolve as I enter motherhood in the next few weeks. My time and energy for cooking will not be the same, but my need for clean and nourishing foods will be greater than ever. In my Pregnancy and Postpartum Nutrition Plan, I mentioned that I am stocking my freezer with both grab and go meals and building blocks for making them quickly and easily.

Soups are easy to freeze and defrost for a nutrient dense meal.

4 Ways I'm Stocking my Freezer for Clean Eating

1. Soups- soups are one of the best nutrient dense meals for freezing and staying fresh. I am freezing a variety of soups including:

   • Nourishing Mama Squash Soup found in this blog post

   • Immune Boosting/Gut Healing Lemon Chicken Soup

   • Sweet Potato + Parsnip Bone Broth Soup

   • “Cream” of Broccoli Soup from the Good Gut Fuel E-Book

   • Zucchini, White Bean and Chicken Soup

2. Protein- I want to make sure I have high quality protein options to add to my veggie/grain bowls. I am freezing:

   • Beet Falafel

   • Lamb meatballs

   • Meat sauce

   • Baked chicken breasts

3. Snacks- There are plenty of packaged options, but homemade snacks are always cheaper and cleaner! I am freezing:

   • Gooey Almond Butter Bars

   • Flourless Banana Collagen Muffins

   • Secret Ingredient Snack Balls

4. Smoothies- I am freezing packets of smoothie ingredients that I can simply add nut milk to and blend. Some of the combinations I am doing are:

   • Frozen cherries, avocado and banana to make the Cherry Almond Recovery Bowl

   • Frozen blueberries and cauliflower to make the Blueberry Cauliflower Smoothie Bowl

   • Frozen banana, pumpkin and peeled ginger to make the Ginger Turmeric Pumpkin Smoothie

These kind of snack balls go way too fast so I love to make a double batch to freeze some for later!

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How Our Breech Baby Flipped at 37 Weeks

How Our Breech Baby Flipped at 37 Weeks

But first, a little background…

I am still in shock to be sharing this blog post for two reasons. One being that we were told for weeks and weeks that baby was head down, until a 36 week ultrasound that revealed something quite different. Secondly, that I am able to share the outcome that at 37 weeks and 3 days our baby decided to flip. This happens spontaneously in such a small percentage of people (after 37 weeks) that I honestly can’t even find a statistic for it despite all my searching. When we discovered our baby had, I was dumbfounded and asked the doctors if they were joking… more on this later (or scroll to the bottom if you want to skip to our full story)!

There are endless options for what to do when you find out that you have a breech baby, so before I dive into our story, lets chat about some of the basic 411. All of the statistics* that I share in this blog post come from studies cited via Evidence Based Birth- which is my go to resource for the facts when it comes to pregnancy. First and foremost, what is a “breech baby?” Babies are typically and most easily/safely born head first since the head is the largest part of the body. When a baby is breech (only 3.9%* are at term), he or she is head up in the womb and has not turned into this optimal positioning for a vaginal birth. The implications are that most practitioners will not deliver a breech baby vaginally, resulting in parents having to choose between finding one who will attempt this or scheduling a C-section in the event that baby remains in this position. Of the 3.9%* babies that are breech at term, only 6.8%* end up being born vaginally (the other 93.2%* are born via C-section).

Thankfully our amazing OB is totally on board with our holistic approach to pregnancy and birth. She was supportive in us trying everything we believed could work to naturally help baby flip, then discussed the option of having a medical procedure that could flip the baby. Andrew and I decided to keep the news of baby being breech and decisions/plan that followed between us while we figured it out. This helped us minimize stress and do what felt right intuitively. I will detail ALL of the options we explored below and what I finally think worked for us!

All of the things…

When I say that we did “all of the things,” during that week (36 and a half to 37 and a half weeks) I really mean it! You guys know I love to explore my options and approach health situations holistically, so this is kind of my MO. That being said, I am not suggesting that this is what everyone should do. We are all different and it may stress someone out to try so many things, so if you are in this situation, find what feels right for you. My hope is that by hearing about these options, you can make your own informed decision. Also, please note that I am not a medical professional and you should always consult your care providers in making medical decisions.

Here is what my plan was comprised of (keep reading for my in depth experience of each!):

• Traditional Chinese Medicine (Acupuncture/Moxibustion)

• Chiropractic Care (The Webster Method)

• Spinning Babies/Physical Exercise

• Arvigo Therapy (Mayan Abdominal Massage)

• Cranio Sacral Therapy

• Hypnosis

• Mental/Spiritual Healing

• ECV (External Cephalic Version- hospital procedure)

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My twice daily moxibustion, a traditional Chinese medicine approach where mugwort is burned at the pinky toe

Traditional Chinese Medicine (Acupuncture/Moxibustion)

I went to receive acupuncture on the points associated with helping flip a breech baby twice during that week. I was lucky that this acupuncturist has a policy where he will charge a reduced rates so that moms can come as many times as they want while trying to flip a baby or induce birth (inquire about this and try to negotiate/find one who will if you are in this position!). He kept me there for about an hour and would come in periodically to stimulate the points on my feet.

He also gave me mugwort so that I could perform moxibustion twice a day. I had moxibustion done as a TCM fertility treatment around the same time we conceived, so I was excited and believed that it could help. This consisted of a twice daily ritual where I would have Andrew burn the mugwort stick at my pinky toe on each side until it hurt 6 times (the number was given to me my the acupuncturist based on baby’s energy). After each time, he would do acupressure by quickly squeezing the point before proceeding to the next round. I was so grateful for his open mind and willingness to do this. You can also try to do it to yourself, but its hard to reach your toes at this point in pregnancy!

Chiropractic Care (The Webster Method)

I had already been receiving weekly chiropractic care beginning in the third trimester, so I continued to go during this time. I suggest going to a chiropractor that is an expert at working with pregnant women and is familiar with the Webster Technique, which is used to help flip babies. When I went that day, my back probably cracked more than I’ve ever heard it! I also laid down with something called a peanut between my legs for 10 minutes which allows me to lay in the optimal hip alignment position. This visit is one of the two things that I think REALLY made a huge difference. The day I believe the baby flipped it was right after chiropractic care and during/after the next treatment that I discuss.

Arvigo Therapy (Maya Abdominal Massage)

This is another treatment that I had already been receiving every 1-2 months during pregnancy and highly recommend! It is an abdominal massage that helps align all the organs, including the uterus, to the optimal position. It is used not only during pregnancy, but also for fertility, digestion and more. I got this done twice that week. I believe that the baby moved into at least the transverse position (sideways instead of head up) during the massage, but may have flipped all the way. Everything was nice and loose after my chiropractic care that day and the massage really seems to gently encourage baby to keep swimming around in there until finally getting more comfortable! Things definitely felt different after. The practitioner (who has a background in midwifery) thought baby felt head down but I didn’t really believe it and still felt like maybe he/she was transverse- guess we’ll never know for sure!

Spinning Babies/Physical Exercise

Doing inversions is a great way to get baby up, away from being far down in the pelvis. I had already been doing 3 of the spinning babies exercises nightly (realistically 4ish nights/week) throughout the third trimester. This was a general best practice recommended by my doula. I continued these and did them more frequently that week in addition to doing more inversions both in the pool and via other inverted yoga poses! The day that I believe baby flipped, I started the day with a private yoga lesson where I did supported inversions using the wall and props for about an hour! I would suggest only doing yoga inversions with support and a spot during this point of pregnancy. I would also ONLY work with a yoga teacher or go to a yoga class with knowledge of prenatal yoga and how to flip babies because there are a lot of poses you want to AVOID as well.

CranioSacral Therapy

My usual acupuncturist incorporates CST during may regular treatments, but was out of town during this week! She suggested I go to another CST practitioner for a treatment, which was explained to me as a treatment that releases tiny tensions built up deep within the body. This is done through very gentle touch, so it is considered more of an energy type body work. The practitioner explained each part of my body that had tension and what it might be connected to. Interestingly, the area she felt as being the most tense was the same area that really seemed to crack a lot and open up the next day when I went to the chiropractor, so I believe that she may have started to work through something that then needed a little extra subsequent release.

Hypnosis

The one birth course I took during pregnancy is HypnoBirthing, which teaches you how to breathe and meditate through labor and birth using hypnosis techniques. This is not what may come to mind as someone who is unconscious with their eyes crossed! This type of hypnosis is one where you are in complete control but are using your mind to put your body into a completely relaxed and in touch state. I had read in the book that there was a particularly effective hypnosis treatment done on women with breech babies. I called the teacher to see if she could share the resource and to my surprise she offered to come over and personally guide me through it. I did this once that week, but also downloaded the HypnoBabies breech baby hypnosis which I did 2-3 times as well.

A “spiritual bath” with some visualization mantra cards from the morning of the scheduled procedure

Mental/Spiritual Healing

Because I have no risk factors or physical causes associated with babies being breech, I came to the conclusion that there may be some metaphysical causes and mental/spiritual healing that needed to take place. This is part of the HypnoBirthing philiopsphy- that there may be a fear around birth that you are holding onto preventing baby from feeling like it is safe and time to come, thus not flipping yet. While this may seem “out there,” you can also view it from a more medical/physical perspective that if the body is in fear or “fight or flight mode,” it would not feel like it is safe to birth a baby and may not show physical signs of being ready.

So what did I do? As part of the HypnoBirthing Exercise we did a “fear release” where I discussed my fears, not around birthing, but around postpartum with my teacher. I then did a meditation in the hypnosis where I imaged them being drawn out and away from me. I also went to my regular therapy session that week where I do EMDR and did some around my postpartum fears as well. I will write a whole blog post about my experience with EMDR another time so just look it up if you’re curious for now.

The morning of the procedure I describe below, I created and took a “spiritual bath.” I went on a walk and collected plants that represented feminine, birth and softening/opening to me. I put them in a special bowl from my grandma filled with water and sprayed them with an essential oil/reiki blessed/herb spray that I have. I then splashed the water on my arms, face and belly. This served to get me relaxed and feeling confident, calm and okay with whatever unfolded.

Additionally, I journaled about it and wrote a letter to baby. The letter explained why it is important to turn and also gave baby my unconditional love and trust that if there is some reason he/she is head up and needs to remain that way it is okay and to disregard all of this. I think that is important to note because many babies are breech due to life-threatening circumstances so if your baby doesn’t flip before birth, trust that it is meant to be and okay.

ECV (External Cephalic Version- hospital procedure)

Okay now onto the practice with the most statistical evidence to support its effectiveness, but also the riskiest! This is the procedure that our doctor suggested we try and has a 33%* chance of working for first time moms with breech babies. Basically, two doctors grab the baby from the outside of your body and attempt to maneuver him/her into the head down position. The risks are that baby can become distressed, the placenta or cord could become detached and would call for an immediate emergency C-section.

This was where we had a big decision. After talking to our doula we realized that if we were to schedule a C-section, we could have a better chance of a “gentle cesarian” where we could be likely to have skin to skin, immediate nursing, etc. The ECV could work, but it could also cause us to have to have an emergency C-section which was something we had to face. I happened to have almost all of the factors that make you more likely for a successful Version (my amniotic fluid, size of baby and position of uterus), so we decided it seemed like our odds could be good and it was worth the risk. We scheduled it for a week after the ultrasound where we found out baby was breech, based on our doctor’s recommendation.

Visualization was a powerful tool in staying positive and calm during this time

Our Story….

We discovered in our first ultrasound that the umbilical cord was to the side of the placenta, so our doctor wanted to monitor baby with more ultrasounds than usual. She was comfortable with us basically doing one more than usual towards the end of our pregnancy to make sure everything was okay before birth. We went for that ultrasound at 36 weeks, 2 days and baby was healthy…. however the ultrasound tech had some other news. What everyone had told me felt like the “bony butt” was actually the head! Our baby was breech… something I had heard a lot about from my pregnancy books, podcasts, etc. Because of having this knowledge, I knew exactly what that meant and also what our options were.

Our doctor is very factual and to the point, yet open and non-judgmental. She presented us with numbers about breech babies, what she usually recommends and details about the ECV- then told us to take our time making a decision. I already knew that I definitely wanted to attempt at ECV. Andrew was on board and we left the office with one scheduled in the hospital for the following week.

Immediately after, I proceeded to do all of the things that I detailed above until the procedure was scheduled. The odds of spontaneous flip at this point were low, but I felt it was worth trying everything even just to know I had done everything I could. Sometimes I think that can be enough of a benefit in and of itself with alternative treatments…. it can help with peace of mind, which should never be underestimated when it comes to full mind/body/spirit wellness.

As I mentioned, I felt like baby was in a different position beginning the afternoon before we were scheduled to go to the hospital. If anything, I thought he/she was transverse, but kept trying to visualize a head down baby and the picture I had conjured during my hypnosis session of the doctor saying- “baby is head down, you can go home now! see you when you go into labor!” In my vision, we would leave and go to lunch at one of our favorite cafes, looking forward to a later, spontaneous vaginal birth.

I also continued to be realistic, which helped the anxious side of me cope. We had our back up birth plan with our doula and my hospital bags packed (though we left them at home out of superstition!). We got to the hospital at 10 and checked into labor and delivery. Around 10:30 they brought me back and hooked me up to an IV, monitors to listen to baby’s heartbeat, my pulse, monitor for contractions, etc. As much as I hate IVs, I was happy to have one because I felt super dehydrated from not being able to eat or drink even water since the night before. The nurse said that based on where the heartbeat was coming from, baby was still head up. I was disappointed, but still really hopefully that the procedure would work.

An anesthesiologist was also present and came to speak to me about getting an epidural. I knew my doctor did not plan to use one for this procedure and told him that I would wait for my doctor to arrive. I also tried to keep an open mind and shift my perspective since I had never imagined getting one, but would have needed one if it turned into a C-section.

Our doula arrived at 11 and was a breath of fresh air in that tiny, silent hospital room. She distracted us by chatting about light topics like when we met and got married and massaged my feet with essential oils. I had already misted the room with a reiki healing herbal spray, and had my crystals and dried lavender next to my pillow. Let’s just say I wasn’t surprised when she told me she was shocked by how calm my pulse was on the monitor!

Finally, 2 hours after waiting hooked up to everything and trying to remain calm, my doctor, another physician and 2 nurses rushed into the room, running late from a previous surgery and ready to get started! It was a whirlwind to say the least and reminded me why it is important to practice breathing/remaining calm. They had the uterus numbing drugs ready to inject into me literally inches from my abdomen when they quickly checked baby’s position on an ultrasound to see where to begin the procedure. I felt the device on my pubic bone and head them say “there’s the head,” but couldn’t believe what was happening. How could that be the head? The nurse just said baby was still head up! “Are you sure?? “I asked! “Are you joking? “I couldn’t imagine doctors would joke about something like that but was in shock.

Sure enough, they were serious and my vision slowly came true. As fast as they rushed in, they pulled everything off me and rushed out, telling me they would see me when my water breaks in a few weeks. I felt the most intense rush of emotions and could barely move. I quickly dressed and we left and went to that cafe I had pictured us going to in my vision. As we walked in the door, I asked Andrew to pull of my hospital bracelets, the only physical evidence I now had that this dream like situation was actual reality.

Have you had a breech baby? What did you do? Share in the comments!

If you are reading this and have a breech baby currently, trust that your body and baby know what is best for you, it will all be okay no matter what happens and you will meet your beautiful baby before you know it! <3

Read Next…

5 Unexpected Pregnancy Changes that Caught me by Surprise

Nausea, exhaustion and weird cravings arrived as expected during early pregnancy. They are certainly the more common signs we hear talked about and see on TV. Peeing my pants, stuffing my bra and hacking up phlegm were not amongst the things I was prepared for. The question is why? Upon researching all of my “weirder” and more embarrassing changes, I came to find out that they are just as common as the token morning sickness. Let's get this conversation going to take the stigma away from some of the things we label as gross that are just a normal part of being pregnant. This blog post is for all women and men who want to support and understand women’s bodies and health!

5 Unexpected Pregnancy Changes that Caught me by Surprise:

The Change: Persistent Itchiness

At first I thought it was just because it was winter and my skin was getting dry, but it soon became obvious that the itchiest parts were the ones that were growing and stretching! I tried using the normal oils and creams I have for typical dry skin/itchiness, but that just wasn’t doing the trick.

The Fix: Cotton Clothes and Pregnancy Body Oils/Balm/Creams

I learned that anything but cotton was really tough to wear, especially when it came to bras, the night I wore a lace bra to a party. My nipples were legit on fire and being a size H (BTW you grow like a jillion cup sizes during pregnancy), there wasn’t a chance I could get through the intimate dinner party bra-less without it being obscene. I needed a barrier, so I literally stuffed my bra with toilet paper, which was somewhat softer than the lace. I then after learned to only wear cotton bras and clothing if I didn’t want to be scratching all day and night.

I also have loved using thick body oil after showering in all those itchy spots followed by a body butter or cream. I know it seems like there wouldn’t be a difference between the normal stuff and the pregnancy stuff, but I found way more relief when I bought some of the products specifically designed for expecting moms. My favorite products are the Zoe Organics Belly Butter, Belly Oil and Nipple Balm and the Mama Mio The Tummy Rub Butter.

These are total itchiness life savers for what must be a more common problem than I realized!

The Change: Peeing my Pants

I had definitely heard that pregnant women pee more, but had not heard that they pee THEIR PANTS more. I found this out the hard way when I went to The Class by Taryn Toomey when I was visiting NYC during my first trimester. If you haven’t been, this workout involves an hour of jumping around in some capacity. It’s the absolute best and I love it, but wasn’t just drenched in sweat by the end…. This has continued to be an issue during high impact jumping workouts and when I sneeze! I learned from other expecting and new moms that the issue is common and continues postpartum.

The Fix: Fully Emptying Bladder/Avoiding Jumping/Incorporating Pelvic Floor Work

I try to avoid too much jumping around in workouts and stick to lower impact which has helped! That is not a real solution though. I learned from my favorite pregnancy podcast (shared in my resources list you can download below), that there is pelvic floor work to be done to fix this. I am doing some pelvic floor work during yoga, but am going to look into seeking out a specialist for the remainder or my pregnancy and postpartum. I also learned that completely emptying your bladder can help. Making sure to sit down and relax on the toilet while urinating can help rather than squatting and rushing though peeing- which we all do at times!

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The Change: Thick Mucus

I have the worst allergies and sinuses in general, but things got really bad towards the end of the first trimester. I knew I wasn’t sick because I felt fine otherwise and had a hunch that something else was up. It didn’t take long to discover that thick mucus is a common change during pregnancy because of hormones. Mine is especially bad at night which makes it difficult for anyone to sleep because I can’t stop clearing my throat!

The Fix: Acupuncture/Hot Tea/Hydration/Hot Shower at Night

Getting needles put in my sinuses is something I have always had done at acupuncture from time to time, but has been extra important since this issue has gotten worse during pregnancy! Evening is when it really gets uncomfortable, so taking a hot shower before bed or enjoying a hot cup of tea are other ways I try to break up some of that mucus. Staying hydrated is always challenging for me, but another simple natural remedy.

The Change: Digestion Rollercoaster

I have a history of digestive issues, but prior to pregnancy had relieved most of my symptoms from lifestyle and diet changes. From the very beginning of pregnancy, my IBS flared up like crazy. Nausea, indigestion, gas, heartburn, diarrhea, constipation- you name it, I have had it! Though I wasn’t vomiting like many pregnant women, I was definitely running to the bathroom and not able to go about my usual mornings.

The Fix: Back to Basics

This was a situation where I knew what would help, but had to commit to doing it. I re-committed to incorporating the healing foods and herbs and digestion tips and tricks from my Good Gut Fuel E-Book. I also took time to reflect and document what was making me feel good/bad using the included journaling template. It reminded me that this is a good practice to do anyways from time to time, as our bodies are constantly changing. I can’t say my digestion was perfect after doing this because I do think part of it has to just be the crazy hormones, but it really helped.

The Change: Bloody Noses

I felt like a kid again when I started to get daily nosebleeds at the end of the first trimester. This was extra tricky since my nose was also more stuffed and blowing it would unpredictably result in a murder scene. Apparently since the flow of blood increases drastically during pregnancy, there is a higher chance of getting a bloody nose than usual. I’m sure that the air changing and becoming dryer for winter didn’t help much either!

The Fix: Humidifier

The first and last thing I tried to resolve this issue was getting a humidifier for next to my bed. I recalled having one when I got frequent bloody noses as a child and sure enough, it did the trick this time around. I still get them occasionally but maybe once every week or two versus daily or multiple times a day.

I want to hear the unexpected pregnancy changes you’ve experienced or heard about! Share below to help remove the stigma from what is definitely NOT TMI!

Read next…

The Truth About Pre-Conception and What You NEED to Know

I have so much I would love to share about this beautiful miracle pregnancy and first trimester, but I can’t begin to get into any of that without honoring our pre-conception journey. About 2 years ago was when I started having the conversation with my doctors about conceiving. I legitimately had NO idea how this worked, but knew that we wanted to get pregnant in the next year and that there had to be some important information to consider. At the time I had no close friends or family members (in my generation) who were pregnant or had kids, so I really hadn’t gotten to peak behind the curtain before. Unfortunately, for the first year and a half I was extremely misguided by well-meaning but uninformed medical practitioners. It wasn’t until committing to my own learning and finding the right experts, that I was able to get in a place where my body was ready to conceive.

I know there are so many of you who can relate to this story. I want to ask you to please share a comment after reading with your experience/advice to that we can build community and support around this important topic! We all have our own unique journeys when it comes to hormones, womens health and conception. Whether you’re a future mama, mother, grandmother or not planning on having children, let’s commit to respecting and supporting one another where we are at.

**Please know that I am not a doctor and have no medical background or training. These are the things I wish I knew and should not be considered medical advice. Always listen to your own body and consult with your care providers.

1. TRADE THE BIRTH CONTROL FOR PRENATALS EARLY

If you haven’t read my blog post: “Ditching the Birth Control: What They Don’t Tell You,” I share the challenges that coming off the pill presents. In short, I was assured over and over not to come off of my birth control until about a month before we wanted to conceive. This makes me so upset and frustrated to think about. I honestly CANNOT fathom that there are experts out there telling women this. I am not a doctor, but have now talked to hundreds of women who have shared that they have needed at least 1-2 years to conceive after coming off hormonal birth control, which was the case for me. I literally STILL have not had a regular period since I came off (more on that here), but miraculously got pregnant in the absence of a period. I wish I could shout from the rooftops that most women I have spoken to all agree that our bodies at least needed 1-2 years, NOT MONTHS to be off hormonal birth control. I was told the benefits of going on prenatal vitamins early and started those a year and a half before I conceived. Unfortunately, I was put on the wrong kind- and thankfully switched to the right kind a few months before conceiving. Wrong kind: includes synthetic folate aka folic acid, which can become toxic, especially in those with the common MTHFR mutation (which I have). Right kind: contains methylated folate, which is better for everyone including those with MTHFR (see more under “resources” below).

2. KNOW THAT IT IS TYPICALLY NOT EASY

If I would have known from the beginning that it is common for it to be challenging to conceive and that women who get pregnant by accident or right away when trying are more rare than it seems, it would have helped normalize my experience. I assumed that since we both were healthy, fairly young and the doctors suggested coming off the pill only a month or so before, we would get pregnant in, well… a month or two! Wasn’t it just yesterday in sex ed that they basically convinced us that touching someone of the opposite sex without clothes on would result in a child? What about movies where it seems so effortless and glamorous? NO guys! Society has done us wrong with these false messages. Conceiving a child these days is not usually that quick and easy and everyone needs to know this. Nothing is wrong with you if it takes a while. We live in a world where we are all put on synthetic hormones, exposed to endocrine disruptors and our bodies aren’t as primally functioning as they probably used to be. Just know that if it is taking you time for whatever reason they want to label you with or not, you are not alone!

Including blood nourishing foods like cooked greens, avocado, lamb and beets were some of my go to foods, but I had to be careful not to stress myself out with diet.

3. CONSIDER DIET AS A THING, BUT NOT EVERYTHING.

Food is medicine, and there is a LOT that can help when it comes to fertility. Tweaking your own personal diet to optimize your health based on your individual needs is probably going to help more than randomly incorporating a bunch of new foods and herbs. I started by taking herbal tonics from my acupuncturist while also incorporating a bunch of other roots, herbs and foods on my own for fertility. I eventually went to an herbalist/functional medical practitioner, who based on lab work and his knowledge, helped me tweak my diet and put me on supplements. At first I stuck to his advice religiously and still used a bunch of the other herbs. The combination of doing BOTH was actual insanity guys. DO NOT DO THIS! I drove myself nuts trying to get in all these herbs and foods daily and at a low point even had an excel spreadsheet I would pull up in the grocery store. I finally realized the the stress of all of this was causing more harm than good. I ended up stopping all the herbs and just trying to loosely follow the bigger dietary recommendations such as cutting down on sugar, grains and alcohol (still having some to stay sane!) and incorporating more animal protein, especially chicken thighs and eggs (have choline) and collagen.

I got my first and one of my only post-pill periods on this trip. At the time, I had no supportive doctors and hadn’t told friends or family what was going on.

4. FIND (THE RIGHT) SUPPORT

From pre-conception, to pregnancy to motherhood and beyond, women need support and the right support. I kept quiet about this for so long and it made it feel so shameful. When I finally shared what was happening with family and friends, a weight was lifted off my shoulders. I am most proud of myself though for finding the right experts to help me. I went to 3 OBGYNs before I found one who was patient, centered, open to a more holistic approach and really wanted to listen. I also switched acupuncture locations and practitioners to one that felt like a better fit for me. My most important team member was my functional medical PA/herbalist who acted as an advocate. I was able to have lengthy appointments with him going over my medical records and he had the time to teach me what was happening in my body which was empowering. Sometimes we get comfortable or feel bad being “high maintenance,” but shouldn’t. Whether you are paying through insurance or out of pocket, you are the customer or client who should be being served and catered to. You don’t owe anyone anything except YOURSELF and your health.

5. LEARN TO LET GO

I knew this the whole time, but couldn’t do it. I had heard over and over that when you stop caring, it happens. And guess what? I said F that! This is bullshit because I am never going to stop caring. I hate cliches and it is super cliche and seems like something a smug pregnant person would say. Well I am not going to tell you that anything in the world happens when you stop caring because I will never believe that. But, there is a big difference between caring and clutching. Between hoping and longing. Between manifesting and manipulating. I wish I could explain this to you here, but instead I will share resources (below) that can do a better job. I will also share this blog post: Living in Alignment: The Ultimate Priority, which was also key in clearing (mental/metaphysical) space for the energy needed to conceive a child.

RESOURCES:

• Love the resources on natural fertility from Aimee Raupp. I discovered her through Gabby Bernstein right around the time I conceived and wish I had sooner. She really gets how to blend the need to know science with the importance of taking care of yourself and mental well-being during this time.

• Promise I’ll share more on this in the future, but I can’t talk about my fertility journey without sharing a resource on MTHFR. I have a double copy of this gene and no doctors could help me make any connection between it and fertility/pregnancy until I went to my functional med. guy who explained the effects and put me on supplements to help with methylation cycle.

• Wellness Mama podcast! She covers a ton of topics, but has a lot of good episodes that relate to hormones/fertility. I really dove into some of her archives blog posts and podcasts when trying to do some of my own research and self-help.

• I read these two books while trying to conceive and they helped me flip the switch from obsessing, self-hate and pity and being a control freak to being at peace, letting go and feeling in the flow of life: Letting Go and You Can Heal Your Life

• Supportive friends/family… Remember that you need to communicate and ask for help for your friends and family to support you. It is hard for them to guess what is going on and how you are feeling. Articulate what you are going through and what they can do. It may be going to a doctors appointment, helping find a resource or just listening.

• Supportive team of health experts! Mine includes: A patient centered, open to holistic/natural approaches OBGYN, Herbalist/PA functional medicine practitioner, acupuncturist and my therapist. Each have played an integral role in helping me on my pre-conception and now pregnancy journey. I am happy to provide specific recommendations for those in Louisville if you reach out to me.

What has helped you or someone you know to balance hormones, conceive or cope with the challenges of this process? Please share in the comments!

Read next…

Ditching Birth Control: What They Don't Tell You

I had visions of sharing this blog post with a triumphant, encouraging, Hollywood story plot unfolding. When I started being thrown into the challenges of balancing my stubborn hormones, I knew I was not alone and that my experience would one day be worth sharing. As time has passed by, that authentic, real voice in the back of my head has nagged- don’t you always say that wellness is a journey, not a destination? How can you honestly believe that, but be too afraid to share your journey while it’s still messy raw and unresolved?

Over time, I’ve realized that I am far from alone. As I have become more open about discussing my female challenges, I am discovering that more often than not, my friends, family, acquaintances and even strangers can completely relate. It saddens me how much harm we are doing to ourselves by giving into the fear and discomfort of sharing our stories. By opening up with the women in our lives we can build community, share advice and solutions and help chip away at societal female shame.

Today I am telling my story of having a difficult time coming off birth control after a decade of being on the pill with no break. I hope that all I’ve learned this year can help others who are either in the same boat, want to prepare for this possibility or simply be able to empathize with a friend, sister, daughter or fellow female human who’s going through this all too common challenge.

Okay, now let’s get to it….

My Story

One year ago, this week, I tossed out my hormonal birth control, sat back and waited for a magical flip to switch in my body. Surely an alarm would sound and all the little systems would work together to bring back the natural rhythm of the female cycle in no time… My OBGYN had assured me (without discussing alternative possibilities) that in no more than 2 months I would be back to a normal, healthy cycle. Those months flew by and before I knew it my world flipped upside down and everything I thought I knew was suddenly in question. Bouncing between experiencing amenorrhea (absence of a period) and oligomenorrhea (irregular periods with abnormally lengthy cycles) was confusing and still continues a year later.

I didnt understand how it was possible that with nothing diagnostically wrong with me, my body could be so mysteriously out of whack. I had never even considered this could be an issue while I was on synthetic hormones the majority of my adult female life. Overwhelming feelings of shame, confusion, frustration, resentment, and guilt washed over me day after day. I felt betrayed by a body I no longer recognized as my own. I can now say that I have tried eastern, western, holistic, metaphysical and traditional forms of healing this and want to share what I intuitively feel has helped or hindered.

What’s Helped

• Being open- sharing my experience with family and friends has helped decrease the shame and let me connect with other women in my life who can empathize and share their own stories.

• Finding the right doctor- One year and 3 OBGYNs later, I have now found one who I feel confidently understands how to steer me in the right direction, and also is able to give me the time and respect I know I deserve. Sure it was frustrating to change doctors a few times, but it was worth it for a practitioner who we as women really need to feel comfortable with.

• Having a medical advocate- the functional medicine practitioner I have been seeing has become a medical advocate for me. He compiles all of my test results, symptoms, etc. and is able to synthesize, analyze and explain what it all means. Unlike some of my other doctors, he explains how the systems all work together and how supplements, hormones, diet and other factors all interplay.

• Finding a balance of alternative/eastern and traditional/western medicine- Incorporating acupuncture, energy work, traditional Chinese medicine and homeopathic remedies in addition to being open to tests and prescriptions from my OBGYN has helped me find a balance that I feel comfortable with.

• Therapy/Self-Help- seeing a therapist and reading her recommended metaphysical healing books (such as You Can Heal Your Life) has allowed me to see how my mind/body/spirit are connected and that true healing for any bodily issue has to happen in all 3.

What’s Hindered

• Compartmentalizing my health- focusing solely on the issue in a vacuum at first had limited solutions and didn’t make sense. I also felt like I was putting too much trust/pressure on one person/solution working only with an OBGYN before exploring acupuncture, functional medicine and bringing it up with my therapist.

• Having the wrong practitioners- As mentioned, the first 2 OBGYNs who I was seeing were nice people, but I didn’t feel comfortable with their care. I didn’t feel like they were being thorough, responsive or helping me understand the issue. I also have recently switched acupuncturists to one who does a better job explaining TCM to me and I feel more connected to. I think women tend to feel indebted to continue as a client/patient somewhere as a form of loyalty but we have to let that go and take care of ourselves the way we deserve.

• Going down the research rabbit hole- Podcasts, webmd, blogs, oh my! I think we’ve all been there for one thing or another. While it can be helpful to see what has worked for other people, obsessing and taking too much time to see what is out there can turn into a bigger stressor and also misdiagnose.

• Keeping it a secret- it felt embarrassing and rare to have this issue at first. We are so conditioned to keep anything having to do with female health a secret, but it was causing me to feel lonely and lost.

• Obsessing over remedies- I spent a period of this summer with a full court press on remedies, strictly following a number of different guidelines such as eliminating cold foods according to TCM, completely cutting out sugar, alcohol and other foods to balance hormones and sticking to a strict supplement/herb regiment. This is just TOO much and caused me to be stressed, which honestly probably effects hormones even more than those practices may help. Now I have found a balance where I consider these things and incorporate them when possible, but don’t obsess and live my life according to what intuitively feels best.

This is my story and what has worked for me. I am not a doctor or hormone expert, but am so glad to be able to build community around women’s health and help make this topic less taboo. I see a future where it’s something we can holistically understand and better support and advocate for ourselves and the females in our lives.

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